I need your help!

Lydie was really attached to this nanny when we visited in March last year.

The nannies at Maison have and will always have a special place in my heart. They love on our babies, pray over them, instruct them, wipe their tears, change their diapers, do unbelievable amounts of laundry, cook countless meals and on and on. In the days and weeks after the earthquake, they were the ones to make sure our little seven-month-old Lydie stayed alive. They have sacrificed so much to care for our children. They are true gifts in our children's lives and we are eternally grateful for them.  Here's a recent story of how one nanny touched the lives of 3 boys found living on the streets.

The truck the babies of Maison stayed in after the earthquake.
The nanny in the foreground has toothpaste under her nose
because of the stench of bodies outside the orphanage walls.

My friend, Kelly, founder of The Oak Project, has asked if we would be willing to participate in selling "Rubble-Wear" that will directly support the nannies at Maison.

Here is the story of how Rubble-Wear got started.

You could have a direct impact in helping the lives of these beautiful women of God.

Would you consider purchasing a Rubble-Wear necklace? It's a beautiful reminder of how God makes something beautiful out of the ashes.

Here's a great video that describes the relationship between Maison and The Oak Project.



Each necklace is $25. I am willing to mail anywhere in the United States. Please message me and I will be happy to send your Rubble-Wear to you! Thank you so much!

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Fear

It came back. That pesky hair on my shoulder that grows to an obscene length. Thankfully, it's blonde so nobody else notices it, but I swear on a breezy day I can feel that thing waving in the wind. It's not my friend. I pull it out the second I notice it.

Another foe of mine is fear. I battled fear for too many years. Unexplainable fear, panic, worry. This fear I experienced was a family trait, passed on to me from my grandmother. (Be careful parents and grandparents to what traits you are modeling in your family. It can have consequences beyond what you ever imagined--sorry grandma, I love and forgive you).

When I was a little girl I didn't like slumber parties. I was so afraid of something happening to me. I envied my younger sister who could go anywhere with anybody and be perfectly happy. I desired stability, predictability, and the familiar. We all have battles. We all struggle with things. I knew the fear I had didn't honor God. It was sin.

Then, something broke in me. God miraculously delivered me several years ago. It's something I really can't even explain, but I knew this battle was finally over. And like that pesky hair that shows up every couple months, there is a tendency to slip back into the old sin nature and let the flesh take over. Recently I've wondered how we will ever get Lydie and Samson home on the plane. Will they have a major meltdown? Will they even let us out of the country with them? Will we ever get the call to come get them? Will our family ever been reunited? Do you see where I'm going? It's a dangerous path of self-destructive thought.

But this time it's different. The questions pop in my head, but they are beat down immediately by the Spirit inside me saying "I'm in control. I will fight your battles. Just walk with me." Maybe it's you praying for me. It probably is. And I thank you for that. This is a battle. It truly is.

So far it's been a week of discouraging news. Some of our adoption friends have been dealt some serious blows. There are situations closer to home that have been extremely painful to witness and honestly, I don't know how God is going to have the victory. My heart aches. The only thing I know to do is cling to His promises.

...Because He lives, I can face tomorrow. Because He lives, all fear is gone.

Random accumulation of thoughts

It feels things are coming together, sort of.

We don't know where Stephen will be or what he will be doing next school year. The district is closing down his building. We aren't worried about job loss as he has too many years in the district, but we are praying that he will be moved to a place that's is the perfect fit for him. With our children coming home, hopefully in the near future, we want work to be as stress-free as possible. He's just finishing up a wonderful two-week spring break because he works in a year-round school. Stephen has spent many hours during the past two weeks prepping our house for their arrival.

My boss and I have had several conversations about my future. Good conversations. I'm extremely blessed to be where I am. We've recently hired someone to take my place and my role will become more of a personal assistant of sorts. It's been so hard to make any definitive plans because we don't have a timeline. When our little ones arrive, I will only go in to the office one day a week and the rest of my work will be done at home.

In the meantime, I've developed a huge fear of paper. Yeah, that's right. I've received several massive paper cuts recently. Think....filet-o-fish. I don't know if I will ever be normal again. Part of it is my fault. I never lotion my hands. They are as dry as the Sahara.  Want to scare me next halloween? Come dressed as a ream of 20-pound Georgia-Pacific.

I really enjoy watching people dance. It's kinda funny don't you think? The other day I enjoyed dance-cleaning my house. My cat took one look at me and bolted. Hurt my feelings. I really hope our children have rhythm, cause they aren't going to get it from their parents.

We do enjoy cranking the tunes in the car and "dancing" in our seats. I love David Guetta's, "I can Only Imagine." Stephen can't stand it so it's only played when he's not around. The only way to listen to that song is to turn it up so loud that it rearranges your hairdo. Trust me.

Another favorite as of late is Coldplay's "Paradise." I was already hooked on the song when Rachel introduced me to the video.

Have a good night and don't be afraid to crank up the tunes and dance a little. I won't kill ya, but it just might scare your cat!

Good end to a good week

This morning as we hopped in the car for our morning commute, Stephen reminded me that 32 years ago he made his decision to follow Christ. I decided to honor this day by playing our favorite worship songs which resulted in both of us constantly wiping our eyes for 40 minutes. It was a good drive.

One year ago today we reluctantly and tearfully set our children down and said goodbye for a little while. As hard as it has been to be away from them, our desire was for our next reunion to be lasting and permanent. No coming and going. We knew in our case they would be too young to understand why mommy and daddy visit and leave again. We wish every day that we could go on every bonding trip offered, but we knew we would not be able to do so.  I'll never forget how we felt the days following our homecoming. We could barely function. We had projects planned for when we returned and we found ourselves staring into space feeling like we left a very big piece of ourselves in a far away land.

We decided it would be nice to eat Caribbean food for lunch today. Fried plantains and rice and beans. A little reminder of our time in Haiti.

We came home tonight with a wonderful update on the children:


Lydie:
Head: 47.5 cm
Weight: 11.6 kg
Height: 83 cm
“Lydie is a spunky girl! Her favorite word is ‘No’ and she means it. She enjoys flinging toys and shoes over the toddler wall. She continues to participate in preschool activities, and is increasing her vocabulary daily.”

Samson:
Head: 49 cm
Weight: 10.5 cm
Height: 77.5 cm
“I love my morning hug from Samson on his way back to his room from breakfast. He’s usually covered in whatever he ate, and the hug is sloopy, but I don’t mind. He’s becoming more verbal, but remains on the quieter side. Samson spent time with the mission team in February and was not afraid of them.”

A year

It was one year ago today we first laid eyes on our beautiful children. It's been an emotional day. The picture above, with Lydie in an awkward position (I didn't want to wake her as she freaked out when she was handed to me) was our first photo taken together as a family. They look so tiny. They have grown so much this past year.  By the way, I still don't know where those weird hives came from on my neck and chest.

We received word yesterday that we passed another milestone. MOI. Hallelujah!

What's next, you might ask? This week Pierre is applying for Lydie & Samson's passports. We are getting closer! Thanks for praying, friends.

Good for the heart

The past couple weeks, I've enjoyed several moments that have recharged me and made me just plain happy. The first was our day trip with our dear friends Ron and Lora to Wisconsin to meet up with fellow adopting parents Bill and Kelly. There's nothing like being with a group of people that know exactly what it's like. This table represents 7 kids from Maison.

Stephen, me, Lora, Kelly, Bill & Ron

The following Sunday we traveled down to visit Ron and Lora's church. It was a wonderful morning and we had a great time of fellowship and meeting their church friends. 

I've also discovered this little jewel: http://www.beautifullyrooted.com/ Check it out! If you want to be challenged, uplifted, encouraged by other beautiful women, it's a one-stop shop. The writings submitted are so thought-provoking and beautifully written.  

Then there's this:

 And this:

And her:

 And this:

Simple things that bring a smile to my heart. I may, just may, every once in a while whisper to those lemons to turn yellow and give them a little kiss. When they do ripen, you'll be the first to know, I promise. 

And there's nothing like vacuum therapy to cheer my heart. The week's worth of kitty fur, dust and occasional beetle sucked up into the swirling tunnel of powerful suction. Ahhh. I love cleanliness. By the way, Sir James Dyson, your vacuum rocks my socks off! Thank you.

Yesterday my joy was spending the day with some very dear friends. You know, that kind that have known you forever, I mean, literally forever. As Rachel and I sat in Fazoli's eating the most unhealthy concoction of yummy goodness, I was struck by the table nearby. A group of young girls, laughing hysterically about who knows what. Rachel and I were talking about weighty things, hard things, like the plight of orphans around the world. That kind of stuff. I found myself remembering the days of being young and oblivious, when all that mattered was boys and hair and clothes and having fun. 

Don't get me wrong, we still love to have fun. Nothing could be more fun than celebrating this little miracle!

Micah and his momma Carrie and me

Rachel and Micah

Last night I ran across this one again. Every time I do my heart leaps in thanksgiving and adoration that I belong to a God such as this:  In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. Romans 8:26. 

I often wonder, how is He interceding on my behalf. Is He praying for our children to come home too? Or is He praying that this whole process, the adoption, the kids, don't become an idol in my life? Part of Webster's definition of idol is described as "an object of extreme devotion." My prayer first and foremost is that my focus stays on the One who deserves my full devotion. That is what is best for my heart. He will take care of the rest. 

To be like this...

I write this with some heaviness in my heart because so many of my close friends and readers have lost a parent or never had parents quite like these. I've struggled with how to write about two people that hold so much of my admiration and adoration.  Tears come to my eyes as I try to express my thoughts here.

But as I reflect on the job of parenting and who I want to be, my only logical choice is to look to them as my Godly examples.

Here's some facts I can share with you about these two:

-They are still in love with each other. They are best friends and have each other's backs.

-They have a passion for music and ministering to people through it. Recently they have started a ministry in a small community near their home which has suffered a lot in the last few years. God has blessed this tremendously and it continues to grow!

-They are prayer warriors. Dad fervently prays for each of his kids and grandkids on the way to work each morning. Mom has a spiritual gifting of prayer and I know she has been on her knees many times praying for us throughout our lives. Often when I was young I would find her in her prayer closet alone with the Lord praying for dad and us kids.

-They are two of the nicest people on the planet. They rarely have a bad word to say about anybody and they are quick to forgive.

-They love to have lots of fun! I think dad's philosophy in life is if it's not fun it's not worth doing!

-They know that they have their shortcomings and are not without fault. They are open and honest about the struggles they have faced in their lives.

Recently I received this in the mail from my dad. I don't know if I've ever actually received mail from my dad specifically, it's just not his thing. But, when I opened it, I cried. I'm not sure if he realizes it, but this has to be one of the most loving gifts I have ever received from him. He knows that life really can't be lived well without the Word of God. To know that he cares about my spiritual life and health means more than anything.

I want to be like this. Sure, they are not perfect, they would be the first to admit that, but they are a lot to live up to.

I love you mom and dad. Thank you for being...you.