To be like this...

I write this with some heaviness in my heart because so many of my close friends and readers have lost a parent or never had parents quite like these. I've struggled with how to write about two people that hold so much of my admiration and adoration.  Tears come to my eyes as I try to express my thoughts here.

But as I reflect on the job of parenting and who I want to be, my only logical choice is to look to them as my Godly examples.

Here's some facts I can share with you about these two:

-They are still in love with each other. They are best friends and have each other's backs.

-They have a passion for music and ministering to people through it. Recently they have started a ministry in a small community near their home which has suffered a lot in the last few years. God has blessed this tremendously and it continues to grow!

-They are prayer warriors. Dad fervently prays for each of his kids and grandkids on the way to work each morning. Mom has a spiritual gifting of prayer and I know she has been on her knees many times praying for us throughout our lives. Often when I was young I would find her in her prayer closet alone with the Lord praying for dad and us kids.

-They are two of the nicest people on the planet. They rarely have a bad word to say about anybody and they are quick to forgive.

-They love to have lots of fun! I think dad's philosophy in life is if it's not fun it's not worth doing!

-They know that they have their shortcomings and are not without fault. They are open and honest about the struggles they have faced in their lives.

Recently I received this in the mail from my dad. I don't know if I've ever actually received mail from my dad specifically, it's just not his thing. But, when I opened it, I cried. I'm not sure if he realizes it, but this has to be one of the most loving gifts I have ever received from him. He knows that life really can't be lived well without the Word of God. To know that he cares about my spiritual life and health means more than anything.

I want to be like this. Sure, they are not perfect, they would be the first to admit that, but they are a lot to live up to.

I love you mom and dad. Thank you for being...you.

Sweet Anticipation and a message to myself

You can't rush these things. You can't force a flower to bloom. You can't force paperwork to move faster.

I've experienced a lot of angst lately. I can't relax. Can't settle down. I feel like my brain is going 100 MPH. Saturday night I watched one of my all-time favorite movies--Phenomenon. When John Travolta's character experienced those moments of calm, quiet in the movie, I found myself longing for that peace. Breathe in...breathe out. Settle down Naomi.

Real, lasting peace comes from the Holy Spirit. The next morning as I stood in my kitchen, staring at my unopened Amaryllis plant, it hit me. Or should I say, the peace of God came over me. I breathed Him in. His Spirit spoke to my heart, "it's going to be okay".

I have to admit. This "step" has sort of scared me from the beginning. A year ago, as I researched the Haiti adoption process, those three little letters M-O-I kept coming up in old blogs from 2007 "stuck in MOI for X amount of months." It's so easy to get stuck focusing on Goliath and not on the One who can slay Goliath.

If you are just starting out in this process, let me lend a piece of advice. Focus on the One who called you to this and not on all the rumors and rumors of rumors that WILL come. Be sure God has called you and your spouse to this because your faith will be tested.  Surround yourself with people that you trust and give you support and pray with you. So much of my support is still Team Haiti. We celebrate each other's triumphs and pray for each other when things get hard. Our team has 43 members now and it is just an amazing group of lovely people.

It's going to be okay. Breathe in, breathe out. Focus on what God can do. He is mighty to save!

The hard and the rest

I've had several people come up to me and say, "I don't know how you do it. You seem so strong, so full of faith about all this." Oh, dear friend, I have you fooled. The latest bit of potential bad news can put my emotions into a virtual tailspin.

The thing is, I am spent..worn out..drained. This process takes its toll. It just does. Ask any family adopting from Haiti, it's hard. It will stretch you in places you never could imagine. It will test your patience to a level you never thought possible. Sometimes I'm grateful for the hard. It's shaping me. It's making me stronger. Sometimes I just want to curl up in a ball and go to sleep for a really long time. Wake me up when it's over.

For a decade I have lead worship at my church. Tonight I called my pastor and told him I need a time of refreshing, a time to get replenished. I take my responsibilities very seriously. It was not an easy call to make, but I know I need this. I know Lydie & Samson need a momma who's got her tank full.  He was so gracious to me. We shed some tears, but he understood and I'm so grateful. He left me with this: "life isn't a joyride, but it has moments of joy." I know this difficult road will lead to a joyous end of our family reunited. Oh what joy that will be!

So we enter into rest. I admit, I've bawled the entire time I've written this post. Mostly because I'm just so grateful for the goodness of God... His tender mercies and endless love for me. On our way home from work tonight I put this song on. The words and thoughts from this song have carried me through so much during the past 3 years. He makes it all worthwhile. He is good. My mom always tells me when I get down in the dumps, "fix your eyes on Jesus, Naomi." I encourage you to find a quiet place and play this song. There's a special message for you at the end.

Apparent Project Update

I wanted to take a moment to thank those of you who purchased jewelry to help the beautiful people of Haiti. I sold $1,282 worth!! Those of you who bought jewelry know how beautiful it is and so it was easy to sell. Thank you so much for taking part in such a worthy cause. The purchase of one necklace alone can feed a family for an entire week.